Thought Out Thoughts (Also Known As Rants): On Tinder
Tinder just celebrated its two-year anniversary, but it wasn’t until the end of this summer that I decided to give it a chance. I was against the app for so long because I just didn’t understand the appeal. I’ve deleted it a few times now only to re-download it again, mostly out of boredom. And to be honest, I’m still not sure I understand it. If anything, it has only confirmed my already slightly cynical attitude toward guys my age. I matched with this one guy and without even saying hello first, he just outright said to me: “Are you the SAT because I’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes with a 10 minute break halfway through for snacks.” There must be laws against this sort of nonsense.
Speaking of the law, while doing the usual quick-paced swipe right, swipe left, swipe left, swipe right (You have a match!), something very peculiar happened. As I was swiping left, I realized I had just rejected Svante Myrick. Yes, I had quickly reduced the mayor of Ithaca to just another swipe left. A strange combination of emotions overcame me and a thousand thoughts ran through my head, the most important being, why the hell is the mayor of Ithaca on Tinder?
Tinder. This is Tinder we’re talking about. The place where a guy called me a koala because I have “all the right koalafications,” the place where flexing-in-front-of-the-mirror pics are just as common as the look-at-me-climbing-a-mountain pics. It contributes to so much of the criticism our generation receives.
But look at it this way, in January 2012 Svante Myrick became mayor of Ithaca. Tinder came out in September 2012. This means that Svante Myrick, as the mayor of Ithaca, consciously downloaded Tinder on to his phone with what I assume can only be the exact same
intentions as the rest of us. Why. Have there been matches? Who are these girls? Is he lonely? Did he swipe left for me? Am I not good enough for him? Is he using other digital dating platforms? Are there other government officials on Tinder? Administrators? IS TOM ROCHON ON TINDER?!
Svante, I have seen you in College Town Bagels. We have exchanged smiles, but now, now Mr. Mayor, I have questions for you.
Jodi is a senior journalism major who is patiently waiting for her opportunity to swipe right for Tom Rochon. You can contact her at firstname.lastname@example.org.