By Andrew Lindsay
It has been more than a decade since the Power Rangers finished their duty, defending the innocent against the loathsome forces of evil, and left the streets of Angel Grove City. The city was all but leveled each week in the wake of fights between the Power Rangers’ Megazord and its opponent.
“There were a lot of casualties in those years, what with the massive amounts of collateral damage, but most of them were just construction workers working on previously wrecked buildings,” the Mayor said in an interview last week.
“Angel Grove was very much a town of migrant workers looking for construction jobs,” he added. “How else could so much of the city be rebuilt so quickly each week?”
Interestingly, as the city swelled with laborers, more and more suburbs were created to house the influx of workers. Once the Power Rangers won their war after years of weekly after school fighting, however, most of the population left, knowing the demand for labor would drop exponentially. With the absence of the Power Rangers, these suburbs have become the ‘90s-style equivalent of old-fashioned western ghost towns.
“Yeah, it’s a curse and a gift at the same time because the majority of the homeless have wound up squatting in the old suburbs,” the Mayor said. “But on the plus side, we have also seen a noticeable decrease in teenagers with attitude.”
The Power Rangers provided the city of Angel Grove with a multi-layered economic boom. Not only did they create a demand for laborers, but the high-profile super-beings also brought a torrential number of tourists hoping to catch a glimpse of the Rangers, a monster or even just a few of the Putties.
“Good Lord, the amount of merchandising the city did was obnoxious! I still own a complete set of replica T-shirts,” the Mayor said.
When surveyed, native Angel-Grovians commented that they missed the costumed warriors.
“Yeah, it was a bitch having your life in constant danger from mutant armadillos or anthropomorphic piranhas with nunchucks or whatever,” long-time resident Patrick Willis said. “But we all felt those Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers were the soul of our city.”
Andrew Lindsay is a sophomore writing major who just wanted a picture with one of the putties.Email him at firstname.lastname@example.org.